OCD and sick days

To all of you who follow just this blog, please know that I am sorry for not updating recently! I'm being a little OCD and trying to catch my private blog up to this one, so that there are the same number of entries... I'm two away from them having the same amount! This may seem silly to some of you... but this is just how I am sometimes. Once I am up to par for both blogs, I will be back to blogging daily, as usual!

Also, for those of you who do not follow the private story, Keeper has been pretty ill the last few days, and we spent yesterday at home, in bed, watching movies all day. It was quite nice. I fear I may be coming down with a bit of some kind of sickness as well, but nothing as bad as Keeper has/had.

Today, we work at the museum for a bit, and then who knows what afterwards. Maybe we'll go on an adventure! Or possibly, we'll play one of our new video games.... One of which includes an adventure.... with Winnie the Pooh! :D

Until next time, stay healthy!

"Be Good To Yourself Today."

My boss has chocolates in a basket in his office every day. I like the Dove chocolates the most. Especially the almond ones and caramel ones. The caramel one I ate this morning told me, "Be good to yourself today."  I find this to be very good advice, as Keeper is sick now, and we've come into work early, so that we can leave early.

I'm working a pre-screening of Jane Eyre tonight. I'm pretty excited for it. Or, at least, I will be, once I actually wake up. I am definitely nowhere near awake right now. I'm physically up and functioning, but I am not awake as of yet. I'm not sure when exactly I will wake up, but I'm sure I'll be awake enough by noon or so.



My almond chocolate wrapper say "Shut out the world for just one moment." To be honest, right now, I wish I could. But i'm at work. There's a stack next to me of magazines that some articles need to be clipped out of, and a large stack of papers in front of me that need to have some information added to them. This work is rather boring some days, but if I just listen to the music, I find that the day goes by quickly enough. And, as this is the only source of income that I have right now, I cannot complain.

I think I will feel better once I go home, and can just lie around with my love, and our cats. Maybe play some video games, or watch a movie... Today will be well enough, I think.

Hope your day is wonderful, and possibly full of unicorns.

Puppy Dogs and Ice Cream.

Really low-key today. Got up, had frosted mini wheats (with fruit in the middle) for breakfast, showered, wrote in my private blog, and then went out for lunch with an old friend. While I was blogging this morning though, Keeper decided to start.... measuring... our cats. I'm not entirely sure what's in his head sometimes, but it made me laugh. If you feel like deciphering his thoughts, read here.

Since getting home from running a few errands, Keeper and I have watched Nanny McPhee, and are now watching Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland, until later, when we're gonna go to a movie night at a friend's house.... where there will be french toast and bacon present! Might be a little excited for that. I really want to eat something.... but i'm holding off for a couple hours.

You know, since Keeper has started reading Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland, and Through the Looking Glass, I'm noticing all these little details about the movie adaptations of Alice, and it's strange. The original Alice was quite... retarded. I mean, she's a little girl and all, in the books, but still. For a little girl, she's incredibly unintelligent, and stupid. And in the movies, they portray her as at least a little smarter than the book. If you talk with Keeper about it all, he'll tell you that, although he doesn't mind Tim Burton's Alice, he feels that they should've titled it "Though the Looking Glass", instead of Alice in Wonderland, as this story is closer to the original story of Through the Looking Glass than it is to the original Alice in Wonderland.

Bandersnatch!

Crayons and Melting and Books and Stuffs!

Damn straight. I did just waste 10 seconds of your life there. You're never getting those 10 seconds back! Bwahahahahaha! I'm so maniacal! :D

Had my last day at work at the bookstore tonight. Rather uneventful night. It was busy, to be sure. But it was uneventful. And to top off such a busy, yet uneventful evening, I forgot my glasses at the store.... AND my paycheck! FmL on that one. >.<

I heart cauliflower.  It's tasty. With butter, a little cheese, and a little salt. YUM.

Anyways. I had that really great interview today. And I felt pretty good about myself. And I have to call a couple places back tomorrow. Oh! and I have a lunch with an old friend tomorrow too! I'm pretty psyched about it.

Speaking of friends, I was talking with a few of my best friends the other day, about our favorite Disney movies. It was pretty fun to learn that we're all something different. (NO, J, you're NOT a tie between two! You only get ONE! :P )  I automatically associated all of my friends with the main characters of the movies. Here's a list of what me and all my closest friends are in Disney characters, and after, I'll explain why some of this is so entertaining.

Me: Lion King -Simba
Keeper: Alice In Wonderland -Alice
E.: Aladdin -Aladdin
J: Mulan -Mulan (he tried to convince me that he's tied for Mulan and Aladdin. I said no.)
L (my newest friend): Pocahontas -Pocahontas

I find this all rather entertaining. Let me explain why. While the following reasons that I am about to list are entirely irrelevant to pretty much anything, I still find it amusing.

For starters, L is the only person in that list who's not only their own gender, but also their own species. J is a boy, but his movie character is a girl. E. is not only a girl, but a lesbian, but her character is a guy who hangs out with a monkey, a flying rug, and a genie. Keeper is a really smart (and amazing) guy, but his disney character of choice is a retarded young girl. And me? I'm the coolest one of the bunch! I'm a cat! In real life, I'm a girl, of human heritage. But my character of choice is definitely a male feline. I am truly the most awesome-ist of the bunch. Although, I will admit. We all make up a pretty awesome group. :)

Until next time,
Bring back your childhood, and go watch your favorite disney movie.

Cinderelly-Cinderelly!

 To start off the day today, here's an absolutely adorable picture of my beautiful little Luna! She enjoys curling up in the tunnel. :)

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

I might have a summer job! :D I'm UBER excited about this news!  I went into the interview, applying for a job as a painter (as i typed that, i typed "pianter".... woah the things your hands get used to typing, when you're not even looking), and the guy interviewing me said i'd be perfect for the job site manager position! WOW is that fantastic news or what?!?!?!?!?!? :D

For those of you who may be confused about the fact that this blog is still public, I decided to go ahead and keep this blog public. I have a private blog as well, called Real Pirates Drink: The Private Story, and if you'd like access to that, send me a message or email or text or some form of communication that includes your email address, and I will grant you access, assuming I like you well enough! :D

In other news, our copy of Cinderella is screwy, so the computer went weird this morning, and I did not approve. But, I've downloaded a few other movies, which look fantastic! And! The laundry is going, the dishes are done, and I might have a job!!! :D Who's excited? This girl right here!!! :D

One of the four cats that live here with me and Keeper, was being a butt this morning. He even started scratching on one of daddy's speakers! In this house, that's a HUGE no-no! But, i scolded him, and now he's sulking under one of the couches. OMG so much furniture in this house! We havent moved all of my stuff over here from my apartment yet, but Keeper says we can make a day/weekend of it soon, and have a bunch of friends help us. We're going to have 3 couches! It's gonna be crazy. I feel like I'm talking at a million miles an hour. But, really, my mind is just incredibly alive with possibilities! And i have pizza waiting for me in the other room. And now Keeper's home again! YAY! :D


Also, here's a wonderful couple of pictures of Bolo, as he watches Cinderella. Talk about CUTE! ^_^

As I begin to write here, I have just started the movie Sleeping Beauty in the Background. I have the shades drawn, the room is dark. A pillow fort is under construction! And the cats are going crazy!

20 minutes later....

Fort is complete! Although, I think next time i will have to make it in the bedroom. I have a basic three-room fort going at the moment, with a patio in front, where I can look out the "window" and see the big screen, where I now have Veggietales playing! :)  I might consider taking pictures and posting them.... but I'm waiting for Keeper to come home and explore with me!

Like I said, I think i'll make it in the bedroom next time. We have a triangle sign hanging from the ceiling that i think i can hang a couple sheets from and they can hang over the bed! And, if i do it that way, i'll have an uber sweet fort, and i wont have to lay weird to watch movies! :D It'll be exciting.


OH! Keeper's Home! Time to go!

Until Next time---

Happy Forting! :D

Mountain Dew at 11 in the Morning.... after waking up at 10.

I realized last night, around 4 am, when Keeper and I lay awake, both frustrated and restless, that this is not at all how I wanted this blog to go. I'm brand new to all of this blogging stuff, but I was not planning to have this overly emotional, incredibly personal flood of words on a page.. I was hoping for something a little more... fun.

I cant seem to help it, though. I sit at a computer keyboard, and the words and emotions and everything just floods out through my fingertips, eager to get out of my head and onto this page. I had wanted to do something lighthearted and fun, something with my graphics, or with music, or just some fun ramblings that go through my head. But nothing ever seems to want to come out that way.

To be honest, I'm a little jealous of Keeper. His blog posts... they're beautiful... and deep.... and they paint a picture... I can never seem to do just that. I can convey my emotions rather well.... but I really didn't intend to just flood into this blog.

As I write this, I'm looking over and realizing that my cat Luna is basically an overgrown squirrel.

Ahem. Back to my situation. I think I might just start a new blog, and have two pages. One public, and one private. I think it'll work better that way.... At least, then I can flood all of the everything that gets pent up inside of me, and I can have a lighthearted, fun blog about random ramblings, and everything ridiculous.

In this decision, I will make it available to those of you who like to follow my inner floods, and would also like to read my random ramblings, to do so, following both. If you get removed from being able to view this blog, please message me, and I will add you to the list of people who can view this page.  I think it will work best this way.  I'll leave this up for a day or two, so anyone who wants to contact me about continuing to see this page can do so. If you don't have my email address, phone number, mailing address, or some other form of contacting me, please message me on facebook, or through some other medium that we're friends through. :)

Just to clarify: this is not the end! Simply, a branch off into a grand beginning into the world of blogging!

Rainy Days and Sleepless Nights

If I had my way right now, I’d be at home, building a blanket fort and putting up random strands of krismas lights, so that Keeper and I could snuggle and watch movies for the rest of the day. It's just that kind of day.

Last night, I had to stop myself from thinking. Keeper read me my nightly bed time chapter of Alice in Wonderland, and I stayed awake through it this time. 

The night before last, I had fallen asleep while he was reading to me. I've told him countless times that I love his voice. But not until I had fallen asleep listening to him read me a bedtime story had he actually believed it. His voice is the one sound in the world that I never want to stop listening to. If I’m having a rough day, and he even says one word to me, nothing seems so bad anymore. 

Yesterday was pretty horrid... But Keeper took my hand and told me that everything's going to be alright. And even when my mind never stops racing, he's right there, holding my hand, telling me that he loves me, and that we're going to be okay.

I lie awake last night... tossing and turning... I couldn't find a comfortable spot. And I couldn't stop thinking. My mind kept trying to make me panic, make me cry, make me scream. I had to stop myself. Keeper and I had gotten into an argument the night before, but about something else entirely, something stupid, and it irked my mind. We both seem irritable. I've been getting freaked out lately, but stupid, insignificant things... And he's... idk. He seems a little more... easily angered... than usual. And then yesterday happened. And I had to stop myself. Being a depressive, my mind thought up these stupid, horrid scenarios, where he and I get into these stupid, immature fights about nothing, for no other reason, than that we're both stressed, and I really don’t want that. 

I don’t want to fight with him. And I don’t want to be a burden to him. With the loss of my jobs, and the stress of still having to deal with paying rent for an apartment that I don’t even live in, mixed with all of the stress of having bills to pay besides that... These next couple months are gonna be hard. But I don’t want to be the one who's causing stupid little arguments over nothing. 

I want to be able to help pay for things. Groceries, electricity bills, cat expenses, whatever. I want to be able to provide for us too. But for a little while... I'm not going to be able to. And it scares the crap out of me.

If it was warmer outside... I'd be sitting outside somewhere. Just sitting in the rain... watching... listening... thinking. 

Keeper promises me that we're gonna be ok. He says that everything's going to be alright, that he's going to take care of me. Aside from my mother, I’ve never had someone who just wants to take care of me. And even with my mother, she wasn’t always there. She worked construction, so she was away at work a lot. My sister had to babysit me most of the time, and I had to take care of myself. I've spent the last 6 years taking care of myself. And now I’m with this wonderful man, who says that he's going to take care of me. I don’t even know what it really even means.... to be taken care of.  And it scares me.

Between the fears, the stress, the heightened sense of needing to find a job, and every other emotion running through my body... I really don’t want to be overtaken by these feelings. I don’t want to ruin anything good in my life. I don’t want to lose the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I truly don’t want to lose myself. 

I think I'm going to be okay. Flooding is a grand process that truly helps me calm down and get thoughts out of my head. 

I have to just keep myself calm, and remember to breathe. 

Talking Smacks and Cocoa Puffs

Life is full of ups and downs.  This perpetual roller coaster of good and bad.  And yet life goes on.

Got some pretty fantastic news today. I'm sure most of you have heard that a certain book store is bankrupt and closing 30% of their stores... At least, you would know that if you've followed the news at all.  Well. I happen to work at one of those 200 stores that they're closing, and today I found out that the store will only be open for 8 more days. Take about a crappy situation. But that's not even the best news!

I've been suspended! After being on academic probation for 6 consecutive semesters at this school, this really shouldn't be a surprise. And in all honesty, it wasn't really that surprising. What really entirely sucks about this situation... is the loss of my on-campus job.

So. Not only have I lost my rent-paying job, I've also lost my other-bills-paying/extra cash job! How fantastic is that??? I mean really!

And, on top of all of that, I still have to pay rent for an apartment that I'm not living in for the next two months (at Least)! And at this particular apartment, 90% of my belongings are locked in my room, because my idiot roommate got stolen from, and so now thinks that I'm stupid enough to steal from his room. When I hadn't even been there for a month, he gets shit stolen from his (locked) room, and probably thinks I'm the one who did it! I do not steal. Not from people that I’m friends with, not people that I know, and certainly not people I live with! That's just stupid and immature. Yes, I may be in college, but I'm not that irresponsible. -_-

Now, I'm honestly not going to sit here and complain about how horrid my life is and boohoo, and waaah, and all that crap.  Things have gotten pretty shitty for me in the last two or three weeks. But you know what? I'm strong, and I'm not going to let it get me down. Everything's going to be okay. There's this fantastic man in my life. Today, upon hearing about all of the wonderful news I had received, he took me to one of our favorite places to eat, and bought me lunch, and then chocolate, and made sure to tell me at least 15 times that he loves me, and that he's going to take care of me. Now, I've never really been one to just have and let someone take care of me, but with this man, I know I'm in good hands. I now get to spend the next while looking for jobs.  Talk about good times.

And all the while, my friends are standing by me, and I'm remembering to breathe. When all else fails: Remember to Breathe.

Also: Remember that cats make everything better.